Our Song in General, Love

Dennis, you surprise me all the time.

It’s my birthday today and it’s full moon and it’s a harvest moon. Harvest Moon by Neil Young was our wedding song. I remember when I told the DJ before the wedding which song we would be dancing to and I was worried; would it be awkward? Having 200+ people staring at you while dancing as newlyweds wasn’t something I could envision without feeling nervous so I asked him; “at the end, could you transition to something super fun, maybe soca? So our friends can crash the dance floor and we start the party all together?” “Sure”, he said. “Wedding dance, then party. Got it.” The wedding weekend came and it was a whirlwind of anticipation and laughter and tears and more love than I’ve ever felt in my entire life. @ahlaluna had just passed away and everything we did was infused with an urgency to squeeze every drop out of life. We all felt so much.

We got married. I don’t remember all of it but the sun didn’t come out but it didn’t rain and the arch wasn’t steady so your sister and brother had to stand at the top of the aisle by the lake to hold it down. I remember feeling like we were in a Wes Anderson movie; a bit awkward but so beautiful and everything made sense. I said I do and you cried big, real tears.
After the dinner and all the speeches it was time to dance. Everyone was drunk with magic and the vibe was electric and I’d taken my heels off long ago. Harvest Moon started playing and everything else faded. We danced and it wasn’t awkward. Not at all. I could have danced a thousand dances there, with you. Barefoot on a sticky floor.

The end of the song came and it was much too soon. Suddenly all our friends were there and the music became too loud and the moment was lost. I think about that dance a lot. Looking into your eyes, wondering why I ever thought it would be anything but wonderful to take the first steps to the tune that would carry us for the rest of our lives.

It hasn’t been easy, transitioning from two to three. Everything is different now. But we’re still us. We’re still dancing. Tonight’s Harvest Moon is full and little moon sleeps.

And I love you now
just like I did then.